Hey, I learned something new this week! It’s possible I’m the last person on Earth to hear about glimmers. That is, emotional glimmers.

 

It was news to me, too.

 

Duh, Lily, we’re all the same person.

 

Duh? 9, you have a better vocabulary than that. I wish you’d use it.

And you can stop sounding like Mom. You think you’re so smart, just because you’re older than me- –

 

Thank you, Lily and 9, for the demonstration of emotional triggers, the opposite of emotional glimmers. Now knock it off!

 

Oops, now I’m doing it too.

 

According to whoever (or whatever) it is that compiles information online without attributing an author, triggers are cues that move the body into those fight-or-flight or freeze states. Glimmers are also cues—cues that move the body into that feeling of safety and connection and into the ventral vagal state.

 

The vented vague what?

 

The state in which people feel safe and social, feel connected to other people, feel calm and joyful.

 

What is the practical application of this new learning?

I could have said that, too, I just didn’t feel like it.

 

What struck me usable in regard to triggers and glimmers as described in the essay I read (pretty sure it was from the wellness website dailyom.com) making the choice to look for glimmers in your life instead of stressing about when the next trigger will hit can improve your mental health and build your awareness of the abundance of glimmers around you.

 

Therefore, if you identify your personal glimmers you can deliberately seek them out to improve your mental state?

Showoff!

 

Believe it or not, 9, Lily is in a phase where she often talks like this in regular conversation. Seems like this is a pretty strong trigger for you?

 

Now you’re making it sound like it’s my fault.

 

Let’s turn this into a teachable moment. Instead of focusing on how much Lily’s way of speaking irritates you, 9, think of something else that makes you feel happy and warm on the inside.

 

Like Pink Ears, maybe?

 

Great example of a glimmer! Tell us about Pink Ears.

 

You know how back when we were talking about the Barbie movie and we agreed that we were more stuffed animal people than doll people? Pink Ears is a stuffed animal dog that I got at Southwood’s when Gram worked there. Most of her is white but her ears and part of her face are pink. Her ears are long and floppy and they used to fall off a lot until Mom sewed them in good.

 

 

Why is Pink Ears a glimmer for you?

 

I can’t really explain it, but looking at her just makes me happy. And when I go to sleep at night sometimes I still cuddle with her even though that’s a little kid kind of thing.

Like when you feel sad or scared or when things seem unfair. Believe it or not, 9, I still cuddle with Pink Ears sometimes, too.

 

Gosh, she must be getting really old.

 

 

I think we were three when we first brought Pink Ears home. So in our lives she’s sixty.

 

We still have her? She didn’t disintegrate like Kitty Boy?

 

 

Her coat is no longer a pristine white and pink but yes, 9, she’s still hanging in there with a few other stuffed animals in our bedroom.

 

And in regard to Kitty Boy- –

 

9, close your ears for a minute. Lily, I forbid you to tell 9 about the parental conspiracy that led to the- -disappearance- -of Kitty Boy.

 

She has a right to know!

 

And you know, Lily, that when she’s a little older she’ll figure it out for herself. Because honestly, we don’t have facts on this case, just speculation.

 

Educated speculation.

Be that as it may, we’re not going there right now. Today’s teachable moment is about glimmers, right?

 

So you say.

 

Plus I’m the only one of us who knows how to type. Are you willing to say that Pink Ears is a glimmer in your life, too?

 

Absolutely.

 

Okay. Hey 9, read my lips. You can take your fingers out of your ears now.

 

I want both of you to know that not only does Pink Ears still exist, she’s an emotional glimmer for me, too. Just looking at her makes me smile. All those years, all that love, both of us a bit frayed around the edges but we’ve still got it! And there have been times well beyond being nine or fourteen when I’ve turned to her for security, comfort, hope.

 

The irony of all this is I’m away from home at the moment and can’t get a picture of her for the blog! But soon, okay? I’ll bet some of you out there who are reading this have a memory of a special friend like Pink Ears, and maybe that friend still has a physical presence. Do you think if we all posted pictures or shared memories of these important beings it would bring a little extra glimmer to the world?

 

I’m thinking Yes.